Whose "Dosh" is it anyway!

A few days back my attention was drawn by a friend to a news paper ad on the issue of how the sex of the baby is determined by the X and Y chromosomes. It is common knowledge that a woman who gives birth to a daughter or only daughters is considered "Manhoos" bad luck for the family and is a victim of considerable violence from the family members and snide remarks and sympathy from the community members. We need to change this, we need to communicate to people that sex of the baby is a question of chance and not choice. It is a biological phenomenon where the Y chromosome of a man plays a crucial role in determining the sex of the baby. No amount of prayers, offerings, vrats and visits to holy men can influence it. Violence against the woman is definitely not going to change it.

But what is more important is how do we communicate it to people. The above advertisement and many other communications also say that it is not the "dosh" i.e fault of the woman, as the sex of the baby is determined by the man. Does it mean then that the man is at fault, "doshi"? Are we saying that people should now direct all their anger and frustration against the man. Throw him out of the house, torture him and make him feel inadequate?

More importantly, are we saying that having a daughter IS a "dosh"- a crime, a mistake? What is so criminal about having a daughter?

By using the word "Dosh" in the ad we all are guilty of perpetuating a mindset that looks at daughters as a burden and as a failure. It is the responsibility of all the communication professionals to be conscious of such nuances and work on messages that do not further compound the prejudices.

It is also the responsibility of each one of us, like my friend, to keep our eyes and ears open to such "dosh" in communication and bring it to the notice of the authorities.

At times it may look like we are being too finicky about words. However, remember if we are not conscious of their nuances, we all are at "dosh" for the state of affairs.

COME AND CELEBRATE LAADLI DAY ON 9TH JUNE BY JOINING US AT GATEWAY OF INDIA AT 6 PM, IF YOU ARE IN MUMBAI. YOU CAN ALSO SUPPORT US BY WRITING ON THE ISSUE OF SEX SELECTION OR GIRL CHILD OR MAKING THE GIRLS AND WOMEN IN YOUR FAMILY AND OFFICE FEEL SPECIAL.